The Cold Hard Truth

This blog was written when I first got the diagnosis of Autism for my youngest son.  I transferred this blog to Diary of An Autism Mom...

Well, after a devastating year of appointments, specialists, evaluations, and therapies, we were told last week that my 20 month old son has Autism.  It shouldn't have been a surprise.  He is the baby of four boys with the oldest having Asperger's Syndrome.  I should already know the signs and symptoms but to really wrap my head around having two children on the Autism Spectrum Disorder is disheartening to me. 

He was diagnosed with a trisomy of the SHOX gene of the X chromosome in September but it is a very rare mutation and he is only the 6th person reported to have this mutation.  With nothing to compare his symptoms to other than the genetic disorder I had sort of placed all of his developmental delays and sensory components on the fact that he had a chromosome problems. 

When the panel of child psychologists and therapists rendered their very grim diagnosis I felt like the room was spinning and it was like everything was moving in slow motion.  Autism...again...it can't be.  But it was and it is.  Now learning how to cope with a child that isn't high functioning like my twelve year old son.   Although socially and behaviorally dysfunctional, my oldest child is very smart and considered to be academically gifted in school.  We are at least able to communicate with him about his diagnosis and point out things he needs to work on.  Not sure now how to deal with the diagnosis of classic Autism in my baby considering they told us his social, cognitive, and adaptive skills are that of a 12 month old. 

But I will find a way...I will not hide under the covers...I will march on.  I will educate myself and others.  I will continue to find every outlet for my child.  I will promote as many therapies that accomodate his weakness and will congratulate his strengths.  I am going to make every effort to try to ensure he will have a fighting chance once he enters the school system.  And I will pray.  That is all we can do as parents faced with the hard cold truth about Autism.  We fight and we pray and sometimes we laugh and cry.  At the end of the day we lay our head down and close our eyes knowing we have done all we can do for our children and somehow that will be enough.